Sexual Health, Holistic Health, Emotional Health

Sex Helps You Be Healthy and Happy

by Doris Jeanette, Psy.D.

During my massage this week, my masseuse was working on a knot in my left arm. As is my habit, I was breathing and feeling, trying to let go and relax to a new and deeper level. She put pressure into one of my arm muscles and stretched it out. Boom. I felt a rush of tingling, exciting energy run down my left side flooding the left side of my genitals. Wow. My frozen emotional energy suddenly became flowing, vital energy. These pathways had been inhibited almost 50 years as a result of a childhood experience. This is the stuff of transformation and peak experiences, which we all deserve to have in our daily life.

Sex literally feeds our life force. It is the root of our health and happiness. If our sexuality is sluggish, we are sluggish. If our sexuality is vital, we have enthusiasm, charm and charisma. One of the most passionate people I ever meet is a nun. She has never had intercourse with another person but her sexual energy feeds her consciousness. She produces the most exquisite sensual sculptures made out of wood. You can feel her sexy soul in the form of her work.

Freud was the first in modern history to "re-mind" us that children are sexual. In the time of the Goddess, we did not need to be re-minded. Of course we are born sexual-love and light radiates out of every "bundle of joy." Notice that this is not the same stuff as "The Image" we have been conditioned to believe is sex. You know the stuff that sells cars and fills up the movie screen. I call it "Mechanical Sex." Push a few buttons, do some heavy breathing, throw in a few kisses and have an orgasm. Not very exciting. It does not add to our happiness or health quota. It can actually harm us, because we literally take on all of the other person's energy (yee gads!) and leak out ours.

The source of our power is the second chakra. Jack Swartz, one of my teachers, could see energy and regulate it. He taught me the mechanics of physical energy. It is generated in our gonads and then travels to the second chakra where it is stored in our belly. The second chakra is like the furnace in our house, a reservoir of energy, ready when we need it. This is the source that quickly gives a Mother the strength she needs to lift up a car to pull her son out from under the wheel. This fire in our belly is what will feed every single cell in our body if we allow it to move. The amount of stored energy we have determines how much force we have behind all our endeavors. With this creative energy we can do anything we want - heal, build, write or make money. We can even use it to "make love" with someone when we feel like it.

Yes, this second chakra connects us to others. It allows us to touch and be touched with comfort. If it is closed, we do not trust ourselves to be physically close with another. We are not letting go of control. The result is helplessness, depression and alienation. Desire is what feeds fuel to our fire. For example, Gandhi gave up his favorite activity, sex, in order to devote his life to freeing India. In his later years his fire weakened. To solve this problem he began to sleep at night, only sleep, with his niece to get his desire, and thus his energy, back up to where he needed it to be. So our sexual energy must be flowing and glowing to live life passionately, fully and richly. Without it we are dull, weak and sick.

If we choose to let love penetrate our energy field then we can truly "make love" with another person. We can connect Sex with Love, expressing our emotional and physical love for a person through sexual activity. Then our two energy fields become one as we open up and exchange loving energy. Umm. It feels so good; we never want it to stop. Then. Boom. It does stops. Oh, no, here come those unresolved emotional issues. We all know how it feels when "yuck" comes up inside us to block out this loving energy. Did that second chakra close when I wasn't looking? Or was it my heart?

Our deepest and darkest wounds are in our sexuality. Our body and emotions have been controlled throughout the ages. If you want to read about the aspect of sexuality read Reay Tannahill's Sex in History and then Mary Daly's Gyn-Ecology.

• These are the Blocks that Stop Love
• 1-Anxiety (conditioned, learned responses)
• 2-Fears (real, denied, exaggerated)
• 3-Judgments
• 4-Guilt
• 5-Inhibition of Healthy Emotional Energy Flow
• 6-Need to Stay in Control

  Anxiety and fear create tension in the body, which then dramatically reduces pleasurable sensations. Judgments and guilt are the means by which we inhibit ourselves because we are anxious. Inhibiting our emotions and the need to stay in control are the result of anxiety and fear.

  To enjoy divine sex we have to be relaxed, not anxious. This enables the spiritual and physical vibrations to flow through us. As we reduce our anxiety, pleasure increases. We can unlearn anything maladaptive that we have ever learned. All anxiety and tension can change form. We can let go of control and allow our natural emotions to flow like a river instead of rejecting that part of ourselves. Yes, our inherent, powerful "bundle of joy" is right there inside of us waiting to be set free.

Letting the energy move through my left arm was the end result of previously allowing myself to feel the emotions that were locked in the knot. The next day when I went swimming, I was different. My two sides, male and female, where working better as a unit. I could feel my axis rotating more evenly as I moved through the water faster. Boom. Ecstasy vibrated through my body from head to toe. Whoopee! This is what I came to Earth for.

Copyright © 2002 New Visions Magazine, Inc.